Valentine’s Day looms large for Mina Kitchen–a 40-something single sans boyfriend, and a catering disorder to beat the band. Should she set her sights on Chef? Flirt with James? Romance fills the air (or is that fried chicken?) but dates remain elusive as thefts rattle the shop owners of Lancaster “Pee-Ay.”
KITCHEN ADDICTION! – Meet Mina Kitchen, a forty-something single who likes to cook — and cook and cook. In fact, her zest for whipping up trays of canapés is dwarfed only by her weird luck and mountain-lion size tabby cat, Vinnie.
CHRISTMAS BIZARRE – What do Santa’s Sidekick, a dead lawyer and a geriatric vampire have in common? Meet Mina Kitchen — a forty-something single who finds trouble quicker than she can whip up a batch of breakfast breads. Plural.
This book is loaded with fascinating trivia, fun facts, hard psychology and everything in-between. It provides an exceptionally engaging way to spend your time going through questions, answers, and explainers on some of the trickiest relationship trends today.
What makes those cookies so gosh-darned yummy?
“You need to get a job,” Father said to his children. “You’re in your mid twenties. Time to get out my house.” And so they did.
Hansel and Gretel are two long-haul truckers, a brother and sister team, whose work order is simple: Deliver a truckload of cookies across country to an old witch in the forest. They accept the job, despite the rumors that those who deliver cookies sometimes don’t make it back. When they stop to pick up their load, they notice something isn’t right. Pastries shouldn’t be bleeding and screaming and trying to escape their boxes.
Years ago, a rather ugly child lived in an orphanage. She was picked on mercilessly until one by one the orphans went missing. Now an old witch with a cookie addiction, she sits alone in her mansion made of sweets, waiting for her delivery of baked goods with the one special ingredient in them.
Will Hansel and Gretel make their delivery on time? Will they make it out alive? Will Hansel finally admit that Gretel is the better driver?
Indulge your appetite and feast your eyes on this new twist on an age-old tale.
Step right up, ladies and gentlemen! Meet Didier Rain – that antihero with noble aspirations, that poet with the fickle pen, that eager paramour ever in search of someone to love. In this adventure-laden novelette, we glimpse the rogue as he was in those days prior to his now famous exploits in DELIVERING VIRTUE and FORTUNA AND THE SCAPEGRACE (due out summer 2018). Prepare yourself to be amazed at Rain’s cleverness, daring, and near-to-honorable acts of madcap heroism as he lends a helping hand to a friend. For what self-respecting bard (even when distracted by the promises of a voluptuous one-legged trollop) would deign to allow the mistreatment of a fellow poet, no matter how much a freak of nature that fellow poet might be? This novelette gives us Didier Rain at his finest as a flawed human being. It shows us the man before he became the Chosen One, and maybe even grants us insight into why the gods would eventually pick him for that exalted station so sung in his further novels. So sit back and get to know the man behind the dubious legend. Prepare yourself to be amused!
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Spring is here and things are looking up! Our intrepid hero, Mina, has a new car. Well–it’s new to her. And she even has a boyfriend or two lined up. But that’s because her BFF, Trixie, signed her up on Cupidsbow.com behind her back. Some prospective dates appear a bit odd, but never mind; it’s good to make new friends, right?
All hope of smooth sailing vanishes when Mina hits another bump in the road: she loses her part-time job. And Chef Jack hasn’t been scheduling her at Squirrel Run Acres lately, and her catering for James’ massage gigs are replaced by a new, full-time (and gorgeous) assistant. WTH?
The grim mortgage reaper looms, when suddenly Mina’s solvency is rescued as she stumbles upon a full-time job. A rather peculiar job, with some definitely peculiar co-workers. Who try to kill her–and Chef Jack.
Once upon a time, there were three bears…
Jimmy DiFrenzo is the head of the Figarazzi family, one of the toughest mob families around. He loves his gabagool, his gold chains, and his chest hair. He lives in a nice suburban home with his adoring wife and child. The perfect, yet hackneyed, life of a Sicilian American. But he has secrets.
Blondie is a spoiled little rich girl who always gets her way. When her life becomes tedious, she begins a life of breaking into random homes. She never steals anything; she’s in it for the excitement. All is going swimmingly, till she finds herself the wrong house.
“Someone’s been using my hair gel!”
“Someone’s been eating my gabagool!”
“Someone’s been sleeping on my couch! And there she is!”
Just who is this blond girl that has broken into Jimmy’s home? Did she really pick the wrong house, or does she have a plan? Perhaps she has secrets, too.
Come witness this remix of an age-old classic. This ain’t your grandma’s fairy tale.
It’s the end times.
God is on vacation in Bermuda.
Jesus is a clown.
Lisa is a mental patient with schizoaffective disorder, a stripper, an ascended master, President of the United States, Jesus’s lover, Satan’s ex-wife, God’s replacement, and the author of this book. She’s desperate for love.
Satan is Santa Claus and is trying to gain dominion over the world.
It’s up to Lisa and Jesus to stop Satan from gaining dominion, but it’s not an easy task—and God isn’t much help. If Lisa and Jesus fail, God will destroy the world. If they succeed, they could lose each other.
This novella blends the author’s real delusions, experiences, and imagination to create a magical world filled with unicorns, angels, leprechauns, vampires, ascended masters, Martians, bag ladies, jabberwockies and much more.
In many ways, the novella mimics the experience of having delusions. At first, Fred the unicorn is real, then he isn’t, then he’s real again. Realities shift throughout book, making mental illness come alive.
Be transported to the heights of craziness in this hilarious and sexy comedy, adventure, and romance.
Could Elvis, Mark Twain, and a vampire help her find the Fountain of Youth to save her sister?
Join Bella and Artie as they travel to Australia, hoping to ‘acquire’ the little blue bottle of Fountain of Youth elixir from time travelers Master Simon and Marty Melbourne who are on a mission to find James Melbourne, another ‘fairy’ (time traveler) who arrived at the Land Down Under with The First Fleet of convicts who began the settlement of Australia.
This novella continues The Fairies Saga stories and introduces Fairies Down Under, the next episode in the continuing tales of time travelers who bounce between the 18th and 21st centuries, interacting with the ‘fictional’ characters from the Lost series of romance novels.
The Forbidden Fruit. Come on. Bite it. You know you want to. The snake says it’s okay. Eve says it’s okay. You’re curious, aren’t you, Adam? Bite it. You bit it, didn’t you? It’s all right; we all make mistakes. Paradise wasn’t all it was cracked up to be, anyway. From now on, you’ll have to make your own way. Just you and Eve and your trusty talking goat sidekick, Phil Collins. The book of Genesis. How bad could it be? Take a bite and find out for yourself.
When the whole world stops making sense it`s time to reach for the stars.
Behind the Stars is a feel-good romantic comedy about one nerdy misfit and his creative sister who are trying to find love, sense and each other using their own peculiar ways. With unexpected twists and lots of laughs, this story is a truly hilarious joyride.
Peter is a highly intelligent man who knows his priorities and has plans for everything. Or how his sister Barbara would put it “a nerdy skeptical control freak with android tendencies”. When his girlfriend leaves him accusing him of being too stiff and dull, Peter accepts Barbara`s challenge – to be guided for 30 days by her astrologer`s “cosmic wisdom”. Determined to prove each other wrong, no matter how crazy the things will get, they discover that not everything is what it seems, including themselves and their close ones
A laugh out loud, out of the world- ride of two gentlemen, to redefine humanity, love, science and most of all, happiness.
Happy Singh is a thirty something Indian Canadian, living in Canada. He has built his life exactly as he wanted, but something is missing. One day, he wins a lottery of 2 million dollars and decides to change the world for the better and bring justice for all.
From the Trans-Atlantic slave trade to violent wars and even to the METOO movement, Happy has sworn to bring justice to all branches of human society.
With a crazy scientist, Doctor Jack, Happy Singh sets on a TIME TRAVEL journey to change the world. A whirlpool of misadventures follow, with some life changing results that Happy never expected.
CAUTION-“High level of tolerance and sense of humor is expected from the readers of this book.”
Pianist in a Bordello
What would happen if a politician decided to tell the truth—the whole truth?
Richard Youngblood, aspiring Congressman, is about to find out. He’s running on a platform of honesty and transparency—and against the advice of his friends and advisers he’s decided to start with himself. His autobiography will lay his entire life bare before voters just days before the election.
And what a life he’s had. Born in a commune and named Richard Milhous Nixon Youngblood as an angry shot at his absent father, Richard grows up in the spotlight, the son of an enigmatic fugitive and the grandson of a Republican senator. He’s kidnapped and rescued, kicked out of college for a prank involving turkeys, arrested in Hawaii while trying to deliver secrets to the CIA…Dick Nixon Youngblood’s ready to tell all.
He’ll even tell his readers about the Amandas—three women who share a name but not much else, and who each have helped shape and define the man he’s become.
Are voters really ready for the whole truth?
Pianist in a Bordello is a hilarious political romp through the last four decades of American history, from a narrator who is full of surprises.
After living in New York as an actress/model for twenty years, this 40-year-old-ish has had an incredible life! A friend asks her why and how she’s still single at her age? Now, her whole life is in question.
A strange incident occurs when she’s given a “gold notebook” from a gypsy. We follow her crazy journey, dealing with millennial booty calls, dating apps, and her slight drinking problem. She wants to fall in love again but realizes her past is a roadblock.
We’re taken on a fun, magical ride. As she rediscovers her love of New York, her passions for living and finding happiness and love again in the city that never sleeps… while doing the running man!
If you have Kindle Unlimited it’s Free!
L ALWAYS BE THERE FOR YOU…UNLESS I’M SOMEWHERE ELSE?! highlights the zany, hilarious, everyday experiences of babyboomer mother, comedienne, former media minion, columnist, and blogger, Diane Dean-Epps. Pure non-fiction that READS like fiction, Dean-Epps’ writing style has given birth to a whole new genre of humor writing – “SIT DOWN, STAND UP!” Picking up where she left off with Maternal Meanderings, I’LL ALWAYS BE THERE FOR YOU… UNLESS I’M SOMEWHERE ELSE?! pokes fun at the real-life happenings that make-up the experiences of married couples, parents and just plain adults everywhere. Dean-Epps utilizes her beloved journalistic elements, the 5-W’s and 1-H, in creating her chapter headings: “WHO do you think you are?”; “WHAT in the world were you thinking?; WHEN will I ever learn?; WHERE did that come from?; WHY would you think such a thing?; HOW do I get into these messes?” These sections are organized into easy-to-read segments that allow the time poor, poorly timed reader, to pick up, put down, pick up and put down the book almost as often as they do their eating utensils.
About The Indiscretions of a Candidate by Hannah Chitala:
Every year, during the national examinations, the students of Chokara high are given illegal assistance by their teachers. papers are stolen from the government to prepare them before hand. join Kuvuna and her friends as they try to save the unwilling school from its folly.
“its time to end this era of error,” said Kuvuna as if reciting a poem.
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Spice up your day with an amazing collection of hilarious jokes and short stories about love, sex, and relationships, seasoned with witty quotes from famous actors and comedians!
Daydreaming is dangerous.
Especially if you’re Thaddeus McPhee—his fantasies not only doom him to summer school (complete with repeat bullies) they also land him in hostile territory: think alien wars. Seriously.
As for high school: he’s got a weird family birthmark on his forehead that’s hard to hide, he’s flunking out, and everyone else has a special talent except him—unless snoozing in class counts. Especially his friend Nick: he’s an ace student and super focused on being a famous chef. This comparison—which his parents constantly remind him about—only highlight Tad’s under-achiever skills.
That is, until Tad discovers his own secret powers.
Can he use them to save South Embhali? How will he neutralize Gharewl? And what about the butterfly Princess?
Then again, what about his parents’ ‘gifts’? When were they going to tell him about those? Does this mean they won’t get divorced?
And will the senior jocks ever stop terrorizing him in the gym locker room?
From Glen Rock, New Jersey to the planet of Embhali, travel with Tad as he battles bullies, surfs the stars, and saves the day!
For classmates, Max Wilson & Jeff Button, their disdain towards Texas Tech’s exclusive English department divides relationships. Yet, a new medium, ‘Glanceagram’, is discovered and their dreams of becoming an ‘instapoet’ turn into a grandiose reality neither expected. “Instapoet”, a comedy, draws inspiration from the illustrious Instagram subcommunity. Analyzing trends and exposing devious practices, this novel centralizes on how one’s moral compass is contested with lofty expectations and delusions of grandeur.
While some of his followers clearly understand it’s satire, many others seem not to. -(PBS Newshour)
Poet Thom Young bristles at the popularity of Instapoets, posting satirical verse on the web to prove his point. -The Wall Street Journal
“The funniest book I’ve read, a high comedy for the ages!” -Scott Laudati (author of Play The Devil, Kuboa Press)
Chapter 1. A California girl named Barb met her prince of a guy. He was tall, dark, and handsome. (Actually, he was a Republican. But he was definitely tall.) They fell in love, and got married.
Chapter 2. He brought her to his castle in England and they lived happily ever after. THE END**
**Luckily, 35+ years of living happened between Chapters 1 and 2, giving Barb plenty of material for this collection (in no particular chronological order) from her newspaper columns, articles, blog posts, and that time she killed Mom.
And that’s before Chapter 3 even starts.
“I have learned to put down the coffee and place breakable objects at a safe distance when a post from Barb Taub comes up. It is very hard to drink coffee and laugh at the same time without redecorating the desk…”—author Sue Vincent